Martin Burgers

Scott Beale posted this on Laughing Squid.  Dean knew how to keep it simple.

Common Sense

Yesterday, I shared with you how fast food restaurants like Burger King and Sonic have plans to introduce alcohol to their menus.  The thought is this would increase their “evening” revenue, which they are losing to places like Five Guys who, as of yet, has no plans to serve beer or wine.  Today I saw this story in the Daytona Beach News-Journal

DAYTONA BEACH — The service at a burger joint on International Speedway Boulevard apparently wasn’t fast enough for a 21-year-old Ormond Beach man.

Lawrence Eugene Smith is accused of destroying cash registers and stealing food from the Burger King at 2453 International Speedway Blvd., police said.

According to a Daytona Beach police arrest affidavit, a Burger King employee told officers Smith wanted to purchase a hamburger about 4:15 p.m. Tuesday. When the employee asked further questions, Smith became angry.

“Just give me a hamburger. I’m hungry,” the employee said Smith told her.

Smith then threw items off the counter and ripped the cash registers off the counter, according to an arrest affidavit. The employees fled to the back of the store and Smith jumped the counter and started throwing fruit and signs at them, authorities said.

He then took an order of hamburger and fries and began to eat them “as if nothing happened,” according to the affidavit. Smith left the restaurant after he heard employees calling 9-1-1.

Police said when they arrived at the scene, Smith resisted arrest. As he was being escorted to a police cruiser, Smith spit in the face of one of the officers, the affidavit states. Two officers suffered minor injuries.

Smith was charged with robbery, three counts of resisting arrest with violence and battery on a law enforcement officer. He was being held Wednesday in the Volusia County Branch Jail with bail set at $10,000.

And they think it would be good idea to serve beer to their customers.  To paraphrase Lord Tennyson, “By grease a king, in heart a clown.”

The Century Council reported that in a 2010 survey 1 out of 7 teens, age 12 to 20, stated that they had at least 10 or more alcoholic drinks in a row in the past two weeks.  Obviously, Burger King wants a piece of this untapped market.  At some point there will be commercials of the Burger King kicked back with a cold one and a large fry.  Fast food executives will claim, like their Big Tobacco counterparts did (think Joe Camel), that there is no correlation between their advertisements and underage consumption.

Common sense dictates that an establishment who markets to kids shouldn’t have a Happy Hour.  What’s next? Jello shots at Chuck E.Cheese? Ladies Night at McDonald’s?

Burger News

A few recent stories that caught my attention:

1. In an attempt to increase sales,  Sonic will join Burger King in serving beer and wine.  Do they really think that will help?  The thought is that it will increase evening traffic.  In a related story, Stoners Magazine rated Sonic and Burger King as their new favorite restaurants.
2. McDonald’s is testing a new “pub burger.”  The burger has 1/3 lb of 100 percent Angus beef, hickory-smoked bacon, white cheddar and American cheese, grilled onions, tangy steak sauce and smokey Dijon mustard sauce all housed on an artisan roll.  While I preach against fast food burgers, this is one I might try.
3. According to a new survey, Americans are eating more hamburgers and they are choosing high-end burgers.  Technomic, a food industry consulting firm, says that 50% of Americans eat a burger once a week which is up from 38% in 2009.  They also found that people value taste over price.  You’re welcome.
4. America has claimed the world record for the largest burger ever made, 777 lbs.  It smashed the previous record held by Canada at 590 lbs.  Not so sure we should be proud of this.

Project 52 – Fireworks

First time ever trying to shoot fireworks.  Out of 30 shots, I like these the best.

 

Burger Update – Home Cooking

As I have stated previously, nothing beats a well prepared, home cooked, burger.  I provided some tips in yesterday’s blog and the photos below are a perfect example of the delicious burger fete that awaits you.  This burger was fantastic.  I sliced it in half and was met with a sight that brought a tear to my eye; medium well.  Don’t be afraid.  Juicy, great beef flavor, toasted bun and all this burger needed was a little onion and mustard.

This was not my creation.  This burger was crafted by a NASA rocket scientist.  Seriously.  He has been an integral part of the Shuttle program for years.  To launch a Shuttle into space and bring it back safely again requires a special attention to details.  Luckily for me, he put that same level of detail in to this burgers.

Simple toppings. Great sides.

1. Bread to Beef ratio - spot on 2. Notice grill marks on bread - nice.

Burger Update – 4th of July Tips

Went to back to Twisted Root Burger a couple of weeks ago.  We were down there supporting clients at the summer market and after a long day we went to TRB to unwind.  This time I ordered the Western Burger.  Pepper jack cheese, bacon, onion rings, and a mountain of jalapenos.  This burger is like Clint Eastwood in Unforgiven.  It is definately a messy hamburger, but don’t complain.  The Western burger has no problem shooting an unarmed man.

After eating this burger, along with equally well crafted burgers, it made me think about what goes in to creating a perfect hamburger.  So here are my tips.

1.  The beef is the star, but it allows others to shine.  This means that you don’t need to mix exotic spices in to the beef.  Don’t overwork the beef.  It should be falling apart not stuck together like meatloaf.  Depending on the size of the patties you want, gently roll a ball of ground beef in your hands. I use a press to make the patties.  From there, I sprinkle kosher salt and pepper on both sides.  Sometimes I add a little bit of garlic powder.

2.  I prefer charcoal, but gas grills work fine.  The next great sin against ground beef is cooking it too long.  Medium high temp works best.  With gas you can basically dial in the temp you want.  With charcoal, hold you hand a couple of inches away from the grate, and if you can’t hold it there for more than 5 to 6 seconds then you are good to go.  Cook the patties for about five minutes on each side with the grill uncovered for charcoal and covered with gas.  The burger will be slightly pink inside, but if you want it more done, cook longer.  Try not to move the patties too much, but if there are flare ups you might want to move them to a cooler part of the grill.  For master grillers, you can use those flare ups to add a little char to your burger, but be careful.  I have burned more patties than I care to remember.

3.  Spend a few extra bucks and get quality buns.  Make sure they are the right size for the patties you plan to make.  Too much bun means you get more bread than burger with each bite.  Too little and you end up eating your burger with a fork.  I also think you should toast the bun.  If the burger is juicy, and if you follow tip 1 and 2 it will be, then you want buns that won’t fall apart.

4.  Toppings are the best place to add unique flavors.  The only rule I have here is to try to add to much.  Say you are looking for a little heat, then choose jalapeno or a chipotle sauce, but not both.  Some restaurants offer a four cheese burger, but I find that the flavors get muddle, so stick with just one.  Make sure to have tomatoes, lettuce, and onions available.  People love layering them on their burgers.  I like to use red onions.  I will add them to the patties while they are still on the grill.  From there, cover them with cheese and let the cheese melt.  This keeps the onions from sliding away with the first bite.  This can be done with other toppings, too.

I hope these help.  Have a great 4th of July.

Burger Update – Huntsville

Today’s update takes us to two local establishments; Shaggy’s and Crickets.  First up is Shaggy’s.  Shaggy’s is a great spot with great atmosphere.  They serve either hamburgers or tacos, the mexican hamburger. Eventually, as a reviewer, you are going to faced with a tough decision.  In a previous post, I said that I had never had a bad hamburger.  Well that has changed.

An uninspired beef patty, flimsy bun, mediocre toppings are just a few things wrong with this burger, but are not the worst of their transgressions.  I ordered a burger with cheese which was described on the menu as melted.  What I got was a cold Kraft cheese single slapped on a hockey puck.  I certainly hope they give more care to their tacos because if their success is based on making hamburgers, well, its a great location for a dry cleaners.

Crickets is frankly the best place in town for wings.  Perfectly fried, great flavor, various levels of heat.  But I don’t review wings.  The menu has the typical cheese burger, bacon burger, etc.  But it also has a habanero burger, which I had to order.

The waitress looked at me with horror in her eyes.  She suggested I might prefer the classic burger, with a bowl of prunes and glass of milk.  I told her the habanero burger would be fine.  My eating companions tried to talk me out of it.  I ignored them.  The thing is I like hot, spicy food.  The burger was fine.  Patty was ok, bun was ok, cheese was melted.  The habanero sauce was fine.  It certainly had some heat and added a nice flavor to the burger, but it was missing something.  Maybe a different cheese, monterrey jack perhaps.  Maybe additional toppings, red onions possibly.  Go to Crickets for the wings not the burger.

Side note:  I must have been asked twenty times how I was doing and every time I said I was fine they frowned in disbelief.  There was a sense of disappointment from those at the table and our waitress that I did not burst into flames while eating the habanero burger.

Karma

I strolled through the lobby of Heritage Dormitory on the campus of Harding University.  It was the fall semester of my senior year.  I was a Biology major.  I wasn’t a great student.  I felt that the true college experience couldn’t be found in the classroom, but with friends in the Student Center.  However, I wasn’t a bad student and was conscientious about getting my work done.  Well, that is if I actually liked the work.

I took a Sociology class my senior year.  It was a required class and I had put it off as long as I could.  I really did not like that class.  Primarily because the class was at 1:00 pm Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.  Seriously, I tried, but it was just too hard to stay awake, especially after lunch.  More often than not I opted for the nap.  I never missed a test and I always read the material and was well prepared.  I had an A average.  Well, I would have, but apparently during one of my siestas the professor had explained that an attendance requirement had been instituted.  He was frustrated by the amount of skipping and decided that further unexcused absences would results in grades being lowered.  Once this was factored in my A dropped to a C.

I did like my biology classes.  I had switched my major to biology in the middle of my freshman year.  Originally, I was an accounting major, but one semester of Accounting Principles made me rethink that choice.  In general, I did well in my biology classes.  Well, except for Dr. Plumber’s classes.

Dr. Plumber was regarded as the toughest professor in the Biology department; a designation he relished.  He often said that a C in his class was the equivalent of an A in  another.  I asked him once if that qualifier would be noted on my final transcript.  He just turned and laughed.  I had him for Introduction to Biology, worked extremely hard for that C, and avoided him from that point on.  Well, except for my senior year.

To graduate, I had to take at least one more of Dr. Plumber’s classes, Ecology.  Ecology is the study of how nature works at the macro level.  As it turned out, I liked this class very much.  There were only eleven of us in the class and we became our own support group.  Dr. Plumber loved teaching and especially loved teaching this class because it wasn’t eat up with pre-med students whining about their GPAs.  For the most part, Plumber’s Eleven were true Biology majors who would go on to work in some field of Biology.  Well, except for me.  I was just trying to graduate.

Our labs were hands on.  Once we went out and caught lizards.  We did this by tying live crickets to an end of a stick and hovering them over the lizard.  It was like fishing.  Thinking they were getting an easy meal the lizards would latch on. Even when we lifted them by the string, they hung on.  Of course if they had known what we were going to do to them they would have run at the mere sight of us.  We were there to take their temperatures.  Generally speaking, lizards don’t like to hold thermometers under their tongues which left us with only one other option.  I can still hear their silent screams.

The exams were a combination of essay questions and statistical analysis.  We would sit in class and answer the essay questions and then head over to the computer lab for the statistical analysis.  Because this was 1988 and Harding was a small private school, we didn’t have a lot of computers and often we had to wait our turn for an open terminal.  In an uncharacteristically kind gesture, Dr. Plumber allowed us two extra days after completing the essay portion of the exam to finish the computer portion.  Which brings me back to beginning of the story.

I had just finished taking the written portion of Dr. Plumber’s latest test.  I was headed to my room when two guys who lived across the hall ran up to me.  Breathlessly, they explained how they had scored tickets to for the U2 Rattle and Hum concert in Denver, Colorado that Saturday night.  They asked if I wanted to go . Of course, I said yes.  We made our plans to leave that night.  Besides packing, I had one other chore to complete before leaving.

I ran over to the computer lab.  I figured I had about an hour to complete the exam before we needed to leave for Colorado.  I pulled on the lab’s doors.  Locked.  I looked inside.  Dark.  I looked around and I saw the note.  The lab would be down for the next 24 hours for a scheduled upgrade.  I stood there, perfectly still, staring at the note.  I was hoping some Jedi mind trick would change the words to read, “Yes the lab is down, but don’t worry  Dr. Plumber is an understanding professor and he really wants you to go see U2.  So, go ahead and leave for Denver.”  Alas, the note remained unchanged.

I went outside to think.  The computer portion of the exam was worth 30 points.  Assuming I had answered the previous questions perfectly, the best I could get was a C minus.  A grade that low would sink any hope of maintaining my hard-fought B.  I stood at a crossroad.  Academic responsibility to the left; road trip nirvana to the right.  I turned to the left and dragged my feet towards the conventional.

For the past twenty-four years, I have regretted that decision.  I watched the Rattle and Hum documentary with overwhelming sadness.  U2 was, and still is, a band that transcends time and space. Seeing U2 during the Rattle and Hum tour, would have been like watching Muhammad Ali fight in this prime.  This wasn’t going to the Boat House in Virginia Beach to see the Romantics.  This was going to the White House to have dinner with JFK.  Yet, I chose the equivalent of a happy meal.

With all due respect to Dr. Plumber, since graduating, I have never been asked to describe the relationship between predator and prey in regards to population numbers.  However, I have been asked about my greatest regret.  It is a popular interview question.  I have never told this story during an interview because the only rational conclusion would be that I lacked the cognitive abilities required for the position.  In fact, if an employee told me a similar story I would fire them on the spot.  I have told this story to a great number of teenagers.  They listen expecting the story to end with a diatribe on the importance of their education.  They are shocked when I tell them that if they are in a similar quandary, go to the concert.

The story doesn’t end there.  In what can only be described as karma, I will be sitting in Vanderbilt Stadium tonight watching U2.  A couple of weeks ago I get a text from a friend of mine who says he has two extra tickets to the U2 concert in Nashville.  He asked if I wanted them.  I told him no because I had to mow the lawn.  Of course I told him yes.

So, in a few hours I will drive to Nashville with my wife who loves U2 and has also never seen them.  When I look back on it, maybe this is what the Fates had planned.  After almost twenty years of marriage, we are going to see one of our favorite bands together for the first time.  Now that’s a good story.

Project 52

Driving back from a meeting in Martinsville, VA.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.” Matthew 6: 19&20

The Right Stuff

I went to the Professional Bull Riders rodeo with my Dad and my son last night.  Three generations.  As I watched these young men strap themselves to preposterously large bulls, I thought about how I spend my days.  I am either traveling from meeting to meeting or sitting behind my desk answering emails or the phone.  Not exactly manly.  The most dangerous part of my day is when I drive on 565 because most of you see the Speed Limit signs as nothing more than a suggestion.  When anyone asks me about my job it takes about 1o minutes to describe what I do, but for the guys we saw last night it takes two words; bull rider.  No further explanation needed.  My dad has a similar title; fighter pilot.

Technically, dad was a Naval Flight Officer (NFO).  He was a Radar Intercept Officer (RIO) which means he sat in the backseat, but does not mean he took a backseat.  My dad was selected to attend Top Gun where he spent two weeks training against the best pilots in the world.  I remember when we saw the Tom Cruise movie Top Gun.  He hated it.  First, there isn’t a competition.  This was specialized training designed to make everyone better. Second, the dog fights weren’t realistic.  That move Maverick does where he slows down and the enemy flies right by him is all Hollywood. He also doesn’t remember ever winning a dog fight against an instructor.  Dad flew the F-4 Phantom during the Vietnam War.  He was never in a dog fight, but not because of lack of effort.  Every time they spotted a MIG, the enemy would turn and run.

I remember the times when I would see my Dad with other pilots.  It was like hanging out with professional athletes.  They were confident, self-assured, and bigger than life.  They had the Right Stuff and they knew it.  I wanted to be one of them, but in an unfortunate twist of genetic fate, I inherited the eyesight of Mr. Magoo.

For most of us what we do defines us.  While our profession is certainly a part of our make up it’s just what we do.  Luckily for me, I grew up with a father who understood that.  He loved being an NFO and he worked hard to be the best.  But it was more important for him to be the best husband and the best father he could.  He took his responsibility as a Naval Officer seriously, but he took his responsibility as the head of the family even more seriously.  Above all else, my father taught me to what it means to be a Christian. Thanks Dad.  Happy Father’s Day.